Arseblog, Indeed, Is Fuckin' Excellent

I'm slowly losing interest in mainstream American sports - a topic worthy of its own post at some point - but instead I've somehow managed to pour my faith into Arsenal FC of Barclay's Premier League. You read that correctly: I am a soccer fan now.

When did this happen? My attitude toward soccer had previously been a shrug-worthy "meh" - I appreciated the athleticism and insane passion that the game evoked but never took much notice. Something clicked with me during last year's World Cup and I've been intrigued by the beautiful game ever since.

Why Arsenal? How does a Yank jump on the Gunner bandwagon? Four reasons:

1. Nick Hornby's "Fever Pitch," as fine a love letter to a sports team as you'll ever find.
2. The hilarious writing of Deadspin contributor and passionate Arsenal fan David Hirshey.
3. Tracy's good friend Michelle, a London native and mad supporter of Arsenal. I'm afraid she'd physically hurt me if I rooted for another team. Seriously.
   
4. Touring the new Emirates Stadium in London in July. I know longtime fans prefer Highbury but the club is very respectful toward its illustrious history and I couldn't help but be impressed.

In pursuit of this new passion, I discovered some outstanding Arsenal blogs, my favorite of which is "arseblog." Today the arseblogger posted the following:

Ashley Cole is all over the papers today saying Chelsea can be invincible. Invincible cunts. Invincible shite eating, piss drinking, donkey fisting thundercunts. Nobody will ever come close to being as despicable as this Chelsea team. If football goes on for another million years and through the process of evolution a team is made up from hideous mutants who feast on kittens and small babies before making it compulsary [sic] to listen to Phil Collins music 23 out of every 24 hours they still couldn’t be as cunty as Chelsea.

Now that's brilliant.