Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Opening Day!

Of what, you ask? After 4 months off, my sedentary ass gets back to roller hockey tonight. The Alpharetta Recreation & Parks Adult Roller Hockey league drops the puck on the fall season at 7:30 tonight with Bull Moose Party taking on MD 20/20. My team, the Rolling Bones, squares off against the Large Farvas at 8:30.

Kudos to league commish Kevin McDonald for setting up a cool website with seasonal and career stat spreadsheets. Your humble host, in case you were wondering, has produced the following stat line over the past year: 22 games, 5 goals, 12 assists, 17 points, 8 penalty minutes, and fittingly, 0 game winning goals. Not great but respectable for a defenseman who skates like a monkey on quaaludes.

Attendance typically hovers between 2 - 6 (depending on the temperature -- it's an outdoor rink). Feel free to come on out and boo yours truly; clandestine drinking in the stands is encouraged and unintentional comedy is often present. Fun for the whole family!


w00master said...

Awwww buhhhhhhhh.

I remember when Shawna and I used to come out to your games. Ahhh, those were da days.


Rob said...

Those are some quite heady numbers, my friend. I'm trusting that your +/- on the "ice" is better than your golf handicap. But really, how could it not?

I look forward to attending an upcoming match, getting hammered, and brawling with the Rolling Bones mascot in the stands. Or parking lot if you have no stands. And brawling with a hobo if you have no mascot.

J Ballot said...

Abe-uh --

Good times, good times. You guys actually watched me play when I was somewhat fit and (relatively) quick. These days I'm shlepping around 25 extra pounds and the wheels don't rotate as quick as they once did. But that's OK -- with age comes wisdom, and I know just how to knock those young guys around without getting whistled!


Rob --

"Heady" numbers, yes -- a fine euphemism for "wildly mediocre." For the record, yes, my +/- is actually superior to my golf handicap. That's a tight parallel not seen since 1994 when the burning issue, of course, was which is lower: Greg Maddux's ERA or my college GPA? It was a close race and I'd rather not admit the results.

And I'd better see you hammered at one of our games sometime: the booze, ticket prices, and entertainment value are all much cheaper at Union Hill Park than Philips Arena. We don't have a mascot but we'll arrange to have a hobo present for your brawling pleasure (be careful, though, those guys are mean).

If you come to a game, I promise that your first post-game round at Jefferey's is on me. Let's see Ilya Kovalchuk promise you that, huh?